Zen Monk Offers Help to Maxed-Out Shoppers

Gerbil News Network

NATICK, Mass.  This suburb of Boston is the shopping capital of the “Metrowest” area, with numerous upscale malls.  “We have the Shoppes at Natick Crossing, the Towne Centre Mall, and the newest, Plaza Weste,” says property manager Tori Max.  Why, this reporter asks, so many unusual spellings?  “It is how you distinguish a really classy mall from a strip mall,” she says as she stares with disdain at a shopping center across state Route 9.  “Look at how tacky that place is,” she says with disgust.  “They can’t afford to put an extra ‘e’ at the end of either ‘Sherwood’ or ‘Plaza.’”

“I’ll meet you at the Foode Courte.”

But the current orgy of holiday shopping has left local residents with maxed-out credit cards and a feeling of emptiness of the sort described by Freudian analyst and humanist philosopher Erich Fromm.  “To the extent that man acquires things, he becomes…

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