Dr Samantha Martens, Minister for Good Ideas & Gin, was having a good idea. The good idea was to drink gin. This was a good idea for several reasons. Reason one – the first batch of Cambridge Special Damson Gin, lovingly produced by the fair hand of the Chancellor of the Exchequer, was about to be shipped to an off-licence in Northampton. It seemed only right and proper that this auspicious occasion be toasted. Reason two – the Prime Minister was somewhat jumpy about the interestingly-named Epic State Occasion that was occurring that very evening. Boris, King of Oxford was bringing a consignment of top Oxford bods to thrash out a peace treaty, thereby forgoing the war and hopefully finally resolving the Kitchen Situation. Which brings us neatly to: Reason three – Tony Blair was still tied to a chair in the kitchen and was, quite frankly, becoming something of…
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